this post was submitted on 23 May 2025
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The vice president has some advice for young Americans.

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[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 97 points 1 month ago (2 children)

One can imagine Vance as the type of person who spends a lot of time thinking about how other people have sex

[–] superfes@lemmy.world 88 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 58 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Letstakealook@lemm.ee 32 points 1 month ago

Yeah... at this stage, procreating is a clearly unethical choice. I really feel sympathy for the children of today, their lives will not be great.

[–] redlemace@lemmy.world 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yes, you need to buy a couch to fuck (on)

[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Let me tell you something: if a man could fuck a woman in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house

-Dave Chappelle

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[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 61 points 1 month ago

Just scrolling by, and...

Fucking lol.

[–] ThanksObama@sh.itjust.works 51 points 1 month ago (2 children)

He's just upset there isn't a version of Grindr for furniture.

[–] el_bhm@lemm.ee 13 points 1 month ago
[–] Oneser@lemm.ee 5 points 1 month ago

I'm sorry but this is completely unacceptable format for this media.

Can you please put this is a meme format and re-upload it as its own post? This image and caption needs its own safe space to be discussed in detail.

Regards, The world.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 48 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wait hold on

Tinder is a way to make babies, why would he want people off of Tinder?

[–] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Nobody is matching with him :(

[–] blakenong@lemmings.world 38 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] watson387@sopuli.xyz 34 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I've had just about enough of this mofo's ridiculous eyeliner...

[–] YesButActuallyMaybe@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 month ago

I see him as a failed unsuccessull jack sparrow wannabe

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

The one compliment anyone got from Trump's first admin was that "smokey eyes" thing, and JD's just latched on to it hard

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 25 points 1 month ago

We had three, and they all hate you.

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 23 points 1 month ago

Americans To JD Vance: Find something tall and fall from it.

[–] Akasazh@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

James Donald Bowman is a terrible human being

And I will deadname him every chance I have

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Who is that and why are they relevant to this article?

[–] Akasazh@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

It's the birth name of Vance, who changed it as he doesn't want to be reminded of the abusive asshole named Donald that spawned him, only to cuck for another abusive asshole named Donald.

[–] RidgeDweller@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago

It's the same couchfucker. His birth name has changed a couple times, most recently to Vance around the time he graduated college.

[–] MushuChupacabra@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Nothing suppresses the procreation instinct quite like JD Vance speaking about procreation.

Edit: Here's an nightmare scenario I unfortunately thought of, and will now share it with everybody. Imagine JD Vance stumping for increasing the birth rate, and watching him awkwardly try to touch pregnant women's bellies while interacting.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

You're pregnant? OK. Good.

How far along are you? OK. Good.

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[–] TacoButtPlug@sh.itjust.works 20 points 1 month ago

Me to JD: get off my planet and have throat cancer.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 17 points 1 month ago

Pornhub all the way...no nagging, no baby diapers or teaching nothing.

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 16 points 1 month ago

Bold advice from a couch-fucker

[–] HawlSera@lemm.ee 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Does he not know what Tinder is?

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Does he not know what Tinder is for? 🤔

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[–] match@pawb.social 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

does JD Vance know where babies come from

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[–] SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

We need to ban sex and genital obsessed religious freaks from being able to effect politics.

[–] Donjuanme@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Get off the couch and stop getting off on the couch, someone should tell this antidei fuck

[–] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Does he believe humans can reproduce asexually?

[–] WatDabney@fedia.io 9 points 1 month ago

People end up with some truly bizarre beliefs when they're determined to decree what it is that made this country great and so could make it great again, but immediately reject the things that actually did make it great - good wages, progressive taxes and social services.

[–] Taco2112@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

This American to JD Vance(and other Republicans): stop worrying so much about other people’s bedrooms, it’s the behavior of creeps and pervs.

[–] Kickforce@lemmy.wtf 7 points 1 month ago

But what if I don't enjoy having a baby and would rather have a vegetarian meal instead? Not all of us are carnivores.

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Yeah, get moving building the slave class workforce they need to prop up the oligarchy!!

[–] match@pawb.social 6 points 1 month ago

no breed!! ONLY preg!!

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

guys don't pile on him. he doesn't know how babies are made because he only fucks couches. for him sex never leads to a baby couch so how would he know. for all he knows babies happen to people randomly, but more likely 9 months after they're out of town.

[–] demizerone@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

The Glalthian Mining Consortium needs bodies, so get to procreating humans!

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

What does he think people use Tinder for? Preaching the bible? lmao

[–] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 month ago

Cool, so we’re going to file anti-trust suits against matchgroup, right..?

[–] Envy@fedia.io 5 points 1 month ago

Wish in one hand, fuck a couch in the other, see which one fills up first

[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

He could just lie. He could say all the right things his base wants to hear about how things are unaffordable and how they're going to fix it. He could grand stand about how Trump is going to make babies great again or something.

But he just says dumb shit instead. Truly the blind leading the blind.

[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 4 points 1 month ago

Nah, we're on a birthstrike

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