Ask Lemmy

Just block people.

And they can block you too.

There's a lot of weird people on Lemmy, that's not a bad thing, it's normal for online spaces at this stage. But some people will dominate your time if you let them.

Most recently, someone accused me of trying to manipulate people because of my age and gender.

"Online no one knows I'm not a dog"

That type of stuff rarely comes up, so when people just constantly mention it, it gets noticed.

So just stop saying it, and problem solved

Delete your account and create a new one. Problem solved.

But also, two things. First, always be questioning yourself. Those jerks might have a point. But second, jerks are jerks and you shouldn't listen to them or be bothered by them.

If you can balance those two ideas, you'll do really well online, and probably in real life too.

When I switched from Reddit to Lemmy, it was my opportunity to start a fresh feed.

I stayed away from things like relationships and AITA, because they usually just got me pissed off and fighting with people.

I keep a few political things because I do want to hear what people are saying about current events, but most of my feed now is jokes, and fun conversation.

There isn't even a need to delete it, just make a new one.

I feel that whenever I scroll on a community that allows US politics.

I find it amusing when people try to analyse me. They spend all that time and effort only to be that wrong.

Anyway keep up the good work, you're one of the funny people here even if you're a Republican Chinese communist feminist MGTOW spy here to cause disharmony in utopia.

It would be sad to see you go, your sense of humor has definitely made Lemmy more enjoyable lately. That said Lemmy isn't worth it if your mental health would suffer. Do what's best for you, and if that happens to be posting great shit posts then we will all benefit

So you’re 18/f/cali and someone doesn’t believe you, I mean, personally I wouldn’t be putting personal info out there.

Saw someone comment that you’re like the female Mickey7, and yeah that seems spot on lol. I mean, not everyone’s going to like what you post, but that’s why it’s shitposting.

Who cares what people think, as long as you’re enjoying posting stupid stuff.

Better than some people on here who create a new account every couple hours just to post 1 or two things, then delete their accounts to avoid being banned.

You do you.

So, at risk of sounding like an online stalker, I saw that comment while scrolling from that “50 year old woman” and it was just odd. Don’t take it too hard. Then switched feeds and saw this post.

I say this as nicely as I can, but, this place is largely a collection of nerds, social outcasts, Reddit fugitives(ie nerds and outcasts lol), and people that have been banned from Reddit. Not all or even many interactions here will be status quo.

If it negatively impacts your life, leave, if it’s a social outlet, treat it as such, and don’t take it too hard.

Eh. Sure.

I was also a teenager on the internet, back when Reddit was a chill place to be. Now I'm an adult, with... responsibilities.

My advice?

Enjoy yourself, have fun, be unfiltered, be silly. The internet isn't that big of a deal as long as you keep a degree of separation between your irl identity and online life. It's liberating especially as someone who was a bit socially awkward.

Still, don't forget mental hygiene. A break is good from time to time. Talk to people irl, take a walk, touch grass.

When people get angry online, I do my best to be a duck, let it wash off, respond either pleasantly or with cheer. Life is too short to be miserable, so go forth and have fun little duckling :)

Websites aren't real.

Block the haters. Do what you want.

Just make a new account then

Edit: yoo it's violet08, you make good content, keep it up

I create new accounts from time to time and purge the old ones. That affords me the ability to share myself and experiences without accumulating too much identifying information in one account. So I'd recommend it at some point but where that point is is up to you.

I have been online since 1993 and had been taught and continue to treat everything I post as if it will never be deleted. I don't see a point in deleting my accounts when the data has very likely been duplicated the instant I sent it and could still easily be reposted or used by whoever has access to the database it is stored on; let alone the multitude of unknown bots and agents that may have duplicated it independently.

So, no. It never even crosses my mind because I think it is rather pointless. Of course, it is also because I don't really talk about my personal life in detail enough, or use my real name online so my online identity can be linked to my real one and don't have any fear of something I said when I was 9 being used against me now that I am 41.

If you’re really just a teenage girl hanging out here, until you give proof that you are actually that, people will always wonder wtf you are doing here with all the nerds. And since posting pictures would be a terrible idea for so many reasons, no one will ever know and people will keep speculating or thinking it’s bullshit. And since this is a fringe anonymous communication platform, rightfully so. So idk just keep having fun

Some people will go way out of their way to be offended. Some people just want to make you feel small. But that's not most people. Most people are good. You have to separate the wheat from the chaff. If you get stung from time to time just shake it off and don't become cynical. All the best.

I think its way smaller than Reddit and its very easy to recognize frequent posters/commenters. You also have more impact more easily.

I would echo the others on that it is your choice on how much info you give out about yourself.

I think its crazy to get told that you are a manipulator when I think you are genuine. Especially with age I feel it can be very different how people behave in specific age ranges. If this interaction has felt like too much I think that is very understandable and its always your choice on how to proceed.

I also have to echo the others in saying that I found your postings very entertaining and would be sad to see you go, but you will always have to do whats best for you. I think the other commenter is an asshat though.

Personally I have already deleted some accounts, and having a new fresh slate can be real nice. So experiment with whatever you feel like. And thanks for sharing your silly thoughts until now. Especially a few of the hornier memes were perfect things I could forward to my friends and they also loved it.

Nah.

I blocked the .ml instance like everyone should and I've had a great experience overall.

Block those people, they aren't worth your time. report them too, get the harassers banned

As long as you always comment honestly, admit when you make a mistake, and apologize if need be, then why be concerned about it? If most people understood what you meant, and only one or two people misunderstood, then you might take a second to clarify for them. You don't owe anyone an explanation, though.

The only time I deleted an account is when someone I knew at work discovered my username.

Psst... The block button exists.

Ive been here three years, and ive been accused of being all kinds of things. You cant let it get to you. You should absolutely think about peoples comments and figure out if its about their own issues or if its genuinely a problem with your own personality though.

There are users here who had difficult upbringing because of racism or gender issues, and they will think you are a hateful person if they see a comment they dont agree with on those topics.

Hang in there. If you can make comments and posts that make people feel good (many upvotes), you are helping the community I would say.

Nah, your posts are good. Fuck the haters. I don't even bother to look at usernames 90% of the time but I recognized a few of the posts you've made over the past few days in lemmy shitpost and they are genuinely good.

I felt that way, too. I started enjoying it more again when I started blocking people that I wouldn't want to interact with, and blocking communities that seem to attract that type of person.

If you are talking about the people who don't believe you that you were born in 2008, that's just an aspect about the internet society we have to live with. A lot of people here only have a stereotypical idea of how people of a particular age-group (even their own) behave, especially in the internet. It's a little price for our anonymity that strangers won't accept that you behave outside of your stereotype.

Keep in mind that most of them don't mean you any harm. Predators that lure their victims with a younger age or otherwise problematic scammers are a big problem of the internet and people would rather wrongfully accuse you of that than letting such a scenario play out.

While personally I didn't feel suspicious of you or have no reason to care, when I think about it, I can see that people get irritated by a person who is often highlighting that they are 18. If you really are 18, you probably didn't even notice that and it's natural. But maybe you can imagine that from another perspective, it may look different.

I deleted mine a few times to take long breaks from "social media" (not really a social media, Lemmy/Piefed is more of a forum). This one is probably here to stay. I said too much and my story is too unique, there's no running away and coming back with a new mask.

I think of this as "practice" for confrontations.

Idgaf about tankies falsely accusing me of being a "nazi". I get called racial slurs irl, so this isn't even half as bad lol. Good practice for irl confrontations, practicing to stay calm in face of adversity.

In my experience, it doesn't matter where you are on the internet, you will always be faced with idiots who try to bring you down.

Don't let them win. Be yourself and politely ignore (and block) the hell out of these people. It is YOUR time and you should be able to live it the way YOU want it.

Best of luck and hope to see you around.

I personally like your contributions, they're coming from a novel place compared to the average user here (primarily 30+ dudes in my experience - lots of people that don't fit that mold too but I feel comfortable saying 30+ dude is probably the default here). I can see folks being suspicious of you given this, but it's not like you're going around slipping Venmos in people's DMs. You just hornypost - OMG it's almost like young women have a high sex drive sometimes, crazy concept. And there's been a few of those posts that have made me chuckle.

Welcome home kid. Keep being you, more diversity of users and content is a good thing. Anyone makes you feel like shit about participating here, block their ass. Hell, to a certain extent this holds for me even if you're a 30+ dude pretending to be a young woman (oldest game on the internet, lol) - so long as you're just posting for fun and not trying to get anything from anyone else, or put some poor idiot in a compromising position, who really gives a shit?

Will say that the girls over at https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/femcelmemes would probably (?) enjoy your company if you haven't checked them out yet.

nope. its been fine to me.

because people analyzing my behavior and accusing me of things has started to get to me.

Why bother?

I’m wondering if you’ve ever felt something similar.

Most certainly: as an old dude that has been online since the mid-80s, I've had more than a few opportunities. 1) I learned to not care about perfect stranger's opinion about my person. 2) I also learned to not 'play' with strangers (not saying you are, how would I known, but if you do that may not be the smartest thing to do if you're interested in having interesting exchanges and discussions).

But I think I might delete my account and everything,

That's the nice thing about freedom: if that's what you want to do, by all means do it. Just, maybe, take a moment to decide beforehand if that's really what you want to do or if it's just some emotional reaction angry to something that happened. In the later case it may not be worth deleting your account ;)

someone accused me of trying to manipulate people because of my age and gender.

Your only problem is you haven't established hard boundaries for talking online.

Never use your real information, never reveal it, avoid even talking about it and if you have to give any details like age, location and gender, it's fine to make something up.

Perish the thought that socializing you do online will ever connect with your offline world, don't even go there. Hard rule, never blend the two, especially on public forums like Lemmy. With that rule, it won't matter what people say to you, you're shielded.

For that matter, tighten down ALL your social media, including your personal shit. Take down pictures and personal information. Socialize in person and establish real-world friendships and all of this will feel far less stressful.

I'm dead serious when I say it's very dangerous right now to have unsecured personal information online. If you DO delete your account, make sure you delete all your history as well.

I deleted my Reddit account and made a new one after my ex messaged me, it's a reasonable precaution and good opsec if you don't feel comfortable with people having an easy time tracking you. I want to avoid doing that here if I can though. I don't know to what extent a record of the things you've said can pseudonymously establish status as a unique person given the way AI is changing things, but the other options seem to involve trusting untrustworthy entities or giving up on the internet entirely so it seems worth trying.

In all honesty you should probably delete and create new accounts every 6 months to a year or so. Of course I'm lazy so I don't.

That's the problem with pseudo-anonymous platforms, since every post is logged into a single account it becomes possible to trace completely unrelated posts on unrelated threads and in this case even communities and instances, even to the point of stalking.

And the more posts you write the more information a hostile actor has to be able to correlate information. It's really bad for opsec, since there are no reason for two different posts on two completely unrelated threads to be linked together.

Anonymous image boards are usually much better in that regard, unfortunately chans are nazi bars, so I stopped using them years ago, my guess is that they are also difficult to moderate (though usually the mods are nazis themselves).

What I recommend doing is keep using lemmy but delete your account and make a new one from time to time, I usually do that with every website that requires a login anyway, abandon all old accounts, clear all cookies and browser data, (and apps if you use them), turn off my router overnight so I get a new IP and start anew, make a new email and register new accounts to that email.

Just make a new account every year maybe? But I would recommend getting offline. My attention is pretty shit after years of reddit. Lemmy has been better for me mentally since it's not pumping algorithms

just ignore those people lol, no need to get offended by that or anything