this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] BeefPiano@lemmy.world 158 points 2 years ago (6 children)

“Get out of the dog house card” isn’t going to work the way either of them think. Pulling that card when you’re in the doghouse is not going to make her fine with whatever upset her. There’s a good chance she’ll say she’s “fine” because she doesn’t want to renege on her chart, but whatever conflict isn’t going to resolve itself because he gave her that card.

Trading sex for chores is gross. I don’t want a BJ or lap-dance from a partner that is only doing it because the sticker chart says she has to.

It’s also insane that things like washing dishes or packing lunches or changing diapers aren’t part of the baseline expectations for a dad. You don’t get an award for doing the bare minimum!

Both of these people are demonstrating the emotional intelligence of a block of cheese.

[–] ch00f@lemmy.world 79 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–] dditty@lemm.ee 17 points 2 years ago

I was in a relationship with a controlling partner who made something very similar to this back in ~2016. I can't remember exactly what was on it, but there was definitely a sexual favor reward for some amount of chores (it was like I had to give her X hour-long full body massages or smth) 💀

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[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 34 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Don't slander cheese like that.

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[–] chetradley@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

It’s also insane that things like washing dishes or packing lunches or changing diapers aren’t part of the baseline expectations for a dad.

This is the one that gets me the most. Like, I do the majority of a lot of these things in addition to taking my kid to daycare, doing almost all of the cooking, etc. I do it because I want to help my family, not because I'm saving up for a toothy blowjob.

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[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 69 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Love and affection are commodities to be turned into a transaction.

[–] DrSleepless@lemmy.world 24 points 2 years ago

This guy capitalisms

[–] Fades@lemmy.world 64 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Speak to your partner adult to adult? Nahh, I’ll just treat my husband like another child!

I know it’s rage bait but this shit does happen and it’s cringe as hell

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[–] superduperenigma@lemmy.world 58 points 2 years ago

Sure, she may have infantalized him to an embarrassing degree, but at least she posted it online so the entire world can see how unhealthy their marriage is and how transactional their sex live is.

[–] Mango@lemmy.world 53 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Transactional.

Keeping score isn't love.

[–] platypus_plumba@lemmy.world 22 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (4 children)

I'd totally get her to suck my dick 10 times per day and never nag again. This seems like a good deal.

I can pee and throw up 10 times per day, no issues.

"Honey, the kids are taking 5 lunches to school today, I'm adding the stickers myself, thanks".

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[–] bruhduh@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago

His face tells it

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[–] mhague@lemmy.world 49 points 2 years ago (6 children)

Back in my day we assumed everything on the internet was false, and we liked it.

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[–] EnderMB@lemmy.world 44 points 2 years ago (3 children)

I'd love to see him retaliate with a chart for her

[x] Stop being a cunt -> Stay Married

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[–] Bassman27@lemmy.world 43 points 2 years ago (5 children)

This guy is 100% poisoning his kids so they can throw up

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[–] db2@lemmy.world 39 points 2 years ago (2 children)

The creepiest thing about that is how she wants her husband to be her child and still put his penis in her mouth. Fucked. Up.

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[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 37 points 2 years ago (17 children)

No nagging for a week

This woman must be horribly annoying

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[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 36 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Why you all kink shaming? Dudes a sub if I've ever seen one.

[–] S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Dang I don't see it as kink shame just sad shit. Sex shouldn't be a transactional coin.

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[–] indistincthobby@lemmynsfw.com 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (6 children)

I don't know, from my limited view into the kink community if this was a sub/dom setup he wouldn't need the incentive, the subs I know of in the lifestyle not just the bedroom are legitimately dedicated to their dom counterpart and would do their damndest to keep on top of their duties, not have to be coerced into doing them by a tacky chart

I'm no expert though, I just hang out in a sub focused discord

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[–] Macaroni_ninja@lemmy.world 33 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

It's fake, Its a crooked depiction of a toxic relationship which is fucked up, I know, but why would a guy need to be reminded to clean up, or care for their children?

I see everyone is quick to jump on the domestic abuse hate train, but if you are a guy and not doing these things in a relationship you are just as fucked up as this imaginary psycho partner.

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[–] Zozano@lemy.lol 32 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Step 1: drink water

Step 2: piss

Step 3: put seat down

Step 4: repeat 5 more times

Step 5: wait till I'm nagged

Step 6: remind her of the toilet seat

Step 7: continue ignoring child's needs

Step 8: ignore feelings of depression and ruminate about how fucked my life is

[–] harry_balzac@lemmy.world 29 points 2 years ago

Sorry dude but you are most definitely not Kenough.

[–] TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee 22 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Holy fucking shit his face...

This woman is the epitome of the scorecard partner.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago

He looks like a man who forgot that divorce is an option.

[–] Napain@lemmy.ml 17 points 2 years ago (4 children)
[–] TseseJuer@lemmy.world 34 points 2 years ago (1 children)

do gays not give bjs after a certain amount of gold stars?

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

How exactly do the gays transact for sex with their spouses? Like, do they pick one who will withold sex from the other until chores are done? Or do they swap roles monthly? How do they decide which one will be the begger and which one will grudgingly submit to their clumsy, sweaty defilement?

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[–] pH3ra@lemmy.ml 15 points 2 years ago

He's gonna give her the blow job

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That man's soul is screaming for help behind those eyes.

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[–] Stanwich@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

She's gonna be pissed when the curtie next door is going down on him. He's just gonna point to the chart. Doesn't say who from?

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 years ago

Yeah this looks like a horrible couple photo about 3 months before the inevitable divorce.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 12 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–] MagnyusG@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

naked hula dance by yours truly

I fukn hope not

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 years ago

My kids would absolutely put “BJs” as a reward in my sticker chart.

But to them, BJs is the store I buy paper goods, frozen foods, and non-perishables at. I love that place.

[–] doggle@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 2 years ago

Presumably his wife made it. Hopefully as a joke.

[–] BoxerDevil@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago

Is it just me, or does he have a black eye

[–] imPastaSyndrome@lemm.ee 11 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Why'd they Photoshop her eye upside-down into his left eye?

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[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 years ago (8 children)

This isn't real. This can't be real.

Can it?

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[–] EmergMemeHologram@startrek.website 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

This image is a fractal of red flags. It's almost art.

"I won't donate your favourite put stained shirt"

What the fuck? One, it's a dick move to dispose of his stuff, and two, why are you donating garbage? Does she think the poor want to buy stained clothes? It's like that Seinfeld muffin bottom scene.

Just all of this is awful.

Edit: how far does the "get out of the dog house free" card go?

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[–] MaoZedongers@lemmy.today 9 points 2 years ago

That's fucking horrifying.

How many stickers to get his soul back?

[–] answersplease77@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Look it's the only row with full stickers. He was probably forcing their kid to throw up just so that he can clean it. This's grim as shit

[–] CazRaX@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago

Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 8 points 2 years ago

How many stickers do I get for painting the ceiling?

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