stinky

cross-posted from: https://endlesstalk.org/post/92006827

maybe he's high on drugs, and missing several days of sleep. he's not in his right mind.

he doesn't mean anyone harm. he's not doing this to hurt anyone.

he is convinced that there's something in this person's chimney that he wants.

he is not a threat, and he is not a menace.

he doesn't need jail, he needs water and sleep.

anyone who supports the arrest of this person is contributing to the police state which is destroying us.

When I'm saving money, being kind and considerate, working hard and eating healthy something feels wrong. It's not exactly boredom. It's a desire to fuck things up.

My childhood involved a lot of moving around, constantly leaving friends behind when my parents got new jobs, finding new places to live, then later in life I continued the chaos with sex, drugs and drinking. Stints in rehab, constantly looking for a new job because I'd fucked up the old one, a new place to live after something went wrong at home. The chaos feels normal.

It's like "call of the void" but with my life rather than a single moment. And it's constant. I even have nightmares when things are going well. My brain doesn't know how to be happy.

I was one of four siblings, one had passed, and I couldn't remember his name. I think he was a fiction we'd created to get out of school, and now we were being asked to write an essay about his life. I was angry and frustrated that no one would tell me

They were all pretending. Betrayers, all of them. I came back and he was going through my documents; he'd given up pretending and didn't care that I saw him.

The end of the semester is coming and I haven't gone to any of my electives. I'm pretty sure I'm still going to pass because I'm a music major and did well in my ensembles.

There's an older lady with long curly hair who wants to switch to music and I'm trying to be excited for her. "Oh good, you can teach with Mr. Zabaphore!" but I hate him.

One of my friends is quickly becoming competent; he's invented a device charger with spare parts.

My brother and I are trying to get home, but he can't fly. We're near the elementary school. I grab his hand and try to lift us both up.

The setting is awful but the people aren't too bad. There's a pair of siblings that know something is different about them, but can't remember what it is. The boy is really nice. I'm talking to him while his sister listens.

Hell tries to scare me with an image of my brother who's forgotten who I am, but I laugh it off

I see a man carrying a fancy rapier. I have one too but it's just a practice weapon. I can levitate, but it doesn't feel impressive.

We're creating virtual experiences for a game-making competition. Mine is a rope course, and it's not ready yet. I should have painted it a different color.

Everyone else has been judged already, and their experiences have been wrapped up and ranked.

The judges are coming and I'm still not done.

Our friend's strangely-shaped recreational ship had a railing bent when waves pushed it against the dock.

My boss is looking for a doctor and I'm certain he wants the same prescription I have (Deltek) so I recommend my doctor, who turns out to be a vampire.

The duty of a moderator is to protect vulnerable people. That's it. Their personal opinions are not relevant to a discussion, and in most cases should not be included. Many moderators abuse their privilege to push personal bias on people and "get the last word", and in my opinion this should be grounds for immediate removal.

I have my own struggles with BPD and depression, and I know how hard it can be to meet others' expectations, especially when those expectations are not perfectly clear. Some days it's all I can do to get out of bed. I imagine it's just as hard for people with Autism to meet expectations of people who give ambiguous instructions, or are inconsistent with messaging. I'm guilty of communicating my needs poorly, and I understand that some of this frustration is my fault. But I am fucking tired of Autistic people ignoring what I say, interrupting me, asking me to repeat myself, cutting me off, throwing away my suggestions, and just generally being selfish in conversation. They're so demanding. I have two colleagues that I work with regularly that are on the spectrum and they're both a nightmare, I dread seeing them. I'd rather not work with Autistic people at all.

There are some dangerous people watching me curiously. They haven't hurt me yet. I'm levitating down a steep cliff, showing off, trying to get to the bottom.