this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2026
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I have a friend who lives on the West coast of the US who refers to me as "buddy" a lot, and I don't mention it, but it gives me the ick (she knew me pre-transition). I think she just uses it like a gender-neutral word for anyone (the way "dude" and "bro" ca be used sometimes), but I'm triggered, lol 😅

In public / with people who never knew me before transition, people will often refer to me and whoever I'm with (they're usually women) as "ladies" (ironically my sister-in-law hates how often she is called "ladies" when she's around me, lol).

On the phone or individually people often refer to me as "dear". In the South, I got a lot more "sweetie", "honey", and even "sweet girl" and "good girl".

What have your experiences been like (before, during, and after transition)?

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[–] phr@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

oh yeah i forgot "jungs" exists. i associate it with sports and other heavily homosocial contexts. female equivalent would be "mädels". i guess "mädels" is gaining acceptance? hm.

i hate both. i may not be the most representative speaker of german. if i had something to say everyone would be addressed with just "hey" or "ummm", depending on if you gonna ask a question. (for all the languages) 😆

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 day ago

I found myself very avoidant of gendered language when I was pre-transition, but once I transitioned it was a complete 180 - now I recognize how important and affirming gender can be, so I'm a big fan of gendered language (when used appropriately, obvi).