this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2024
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TIL, after years of playing Stardew Valley on-off, that Pierre apparently has quite the (well-deserved) hatedom.

morshupls

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[–] Luna@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I need the lore. What did Pierre do that makes Jojomart look proletarian?

[–] BobDole@hexbear.net 45 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

smdh y'all out here telling on yourselves for not completing the community bundles

[–] BobDole@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

(I have completed the game, just committing to the bit)

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

He married a green haired MILF which means I can’t marry her.

[–] autism_2@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Luna@hexbear.net 2 points 1 year ago

The only real answer

[–] conditional_soup@lemm.ee 22 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Commies simping for Wal-Mart now? Bruh, what the fuck time line did I quantum leap into?

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Choosing to believe this is AI generated

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

It's a real book

well you see, jojomart is just building productive forces

[–] TerribleHands@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago

Embrace Marxist-Leninist-Waltonist Thought!

[–] mar_k@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

To this day, I still can't get over the fact that the Ferngill Republic, the country Stardew Valley is in, is at war with another country on its southern border and that the Ferngill Republic is almost certainly the aggressor owning to the complete lack of damage towards Stardew Valley's infrastructure. Since Stardew Valley is a border town located at the Ferngill-Gotoro border, it doesn't make sense for Stardew Valley to not suffer damage to its infrastructure from the Gotoro military unless the Ferngill military invaded the Gotoro Empire and have the frontlines be miles south of the internationally recognized Ferngill-Gotoro border.

[–] Krem@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

critical support to giving the veteran husband war flashbacks via popcorn or whatever happened i haven't played this game in six years

[–] RamrodBaguette@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

That's also something annoying since it (along with the Prairie King) implies the existence of guns when I'm risking my neck against eldritch horrors in Skull Cavern and Ridge Forest with a dinky little sword.

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Concerned Ape predicted the Ukraine war??? Is he CIA?

[–] RamrodBaguette@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I used to rationalize this as the two countries preferring not to shit where they eat and duking it out over small tracks of land elsewhere of strategic and economic importance (like an unmentioned archipelago). Then SVE ruined it by adding a Gotoran character (Olivia) who’s worried about her relatives back home.

Would be nice, if there were a class traitor kulak path, to have an option where you amass large amounts of political-economic power and capital-strike the government into peace but I’m probably putting more thought into something the creator intended to be a cheap Iraq/Afghanistan vet analogue with Kent.

[–] BeamBrain@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Been a while since I played the game, what did Pierre do?

[–] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 44 points 1 year ago (4 children)

He's a petite bourgeois parasite who underpays you for your produce, overcharges the townsfolk, and takes credit for high quality produce you sell him. Plus he's got that Mr Beast brain disease that makes him think enjoying himself is a waste of potential earning time, he never participates in festivals and instead operates a popup shop.

The only thing he has going for him is his opposition to Jojo, but that's not even on moral grounds, he just wants his own petite monopoly without the threat of a massive corporation running him out of business. Oh, and he punches the Jojo manager whats-his-nuts (I never interact with Jojo outside mandatory cutscenes) if you encourage him to.

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] Smeagolicious@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

who must jo-go?

[–] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

He's a petite bourgeois

Stardew is literally a petite bourgeois fantasy role play game. You inherit property from your grandpa in some cutesy pastoral town where everyone is a small business Kulak. The proletariat culture of the towns mining past totally erased by these upper middle class yeoman larpers who probably moved into the area when all the mining jobs dried up.

There should be a mod where the Red Guards come into Stardew and forcibly collectivize all your Kulak ass property to grow wheat for the proletariat.

It is a fun game tho I get to make such a cute farm!!!

[–] ryepunk@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Unironically I would adore being given strict demands on how much produce they need and then trying to accomplish that for the glory of the state. Would make for a fun change of pace rather than just growing a quadrillion star fruits and turning them into wine.

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

monkey paw curls

You are now head of the Stardew Valley labor camp in the Ferngill Republic, but Ferngill Republic is a fascist country currently at war with the Socialist Republic of Gotoro (smeared in Ferngillian propaganda as "Gotoro Empire"). Your task is to grow crops to feed Ferngillian troops who are currently waging a war of annihilation in Gotoro lands.

[–] ryepunk@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago

It would be so weird to see it become a papers please, where you need to decide which people can work on the farm, and if you get the spies you can have your produce poisoning the troops, or diverting excess to the Gotoron troops..and it culminates in air strikes on the farm and a tank battle across the village.

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

Daily reminder that the country Stardew Valley is in is currently at war with another country to its southern border, and Kent almost certainly got PTSD from shooting too many Gotoro kids in the face.

[–] RamrodBaguette@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago

Communist Party of Ferngill cadres being confused when I enthusiastically accept the nationalization of Granddad's farm

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Don't forget the fact that he's negligent towards his wife and daughter! And that his daughter may not be his own, depending on if you wanna go down the Rasmodius fan-theory rabbit hole.

[–] mar_k@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

yea it's implied he's very controlling over his (young adult) daughter. when you talk to her in a cutscene in the mini graveyard at night, he comes after her and starts being a pig

[–] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 year ago

Or he's just being protective of his edgy daughter

[–] mar_k@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

takes credit for high quality produce you sell him

also implied when you give him really shitty, slightly rotten produce he'll feed it to his family to save a few pennies. abigail mentions having the thing you sold him for dinner last night and goes "I guess it was starting to go bad and my dad couldn't bear to throw it out!"

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Someone should make a mod where you have a third option of starting your own farmer's market, and then you either slowly become a commune or another small business tyrant, based on things like whether you give away free food and whether you let other people join in.

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

That's why you put all your goods in the little basket/bin for transport

[–] RamrodBaguette@hexbear.net 2 points 1 year ago

Me and my buddy Krobus becoming Co-Chairmen for the Pelican Town Workers' and Farmers' Commune

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why can't I romance JoJo guy?

[–] thethirdgracchi@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Because he's not a person, he's merely the living personification of capital itself.

[–] DefinitelyNotAPhone@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Just imagine the RP possibilities after you marry him though!

porky-happy: "Have you considered renting out your farm to sharecroppers at slave wages to increase profits?"

[–] WashedAnus@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's why I build cabins and force my friends to work my farm for free while I sell all the crops.

Also, Junimo slave labor

[–] RamrodBaguette@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

Counterpoint: Those little bastards made me go to great lengths to get five different varieties of manure for their stupid bundles so fuck em

[–] Parsani@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

The People's Jojamart, but the logo is red.