this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2024
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[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 135 points 10 months ago (6 children)

I'm such a man that I've had sex that my penis resembles an angel hair pasta noodle made of veiny leather. I'm such a sex laden stud that I can fuck any crevice now. I've reached peaked masculinity by being able to top any nook or cranny. Behold and be shamed.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 74 points 10 months ago

The couch beckons, Vance

[–] MrMcGasion@lemmy.world 44 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I'll be impressed when you that down to a subatomic size so you can fuck a solid block of steel because your penis fits in the space between the atoms.

[–] modifier@lemmy.ca 26 points 10 months ago

Tunnnnghsten baby

[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 18 points 10 months ago

Mine can split atoms. Very explosive climax.

[–] prex@aussie.zone 35 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Wanna see my downstairs mixup?

[–] BigFatNips@sh.itjust.works 30 points 10 months ago

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

[–] hate2bme@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

I started with a little peen and was still able to pleasure women.

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 2 points 10 months ago

I use mine to scrape crumbs out of my keyboard.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 65 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

As a Transfem I would prefer not to have it at all :3

(Also im Ace, I'm not waiting for "the right person", I'm playing Fallout New Vegas and enjoying being alone)

[–] RageAgainstTheRich@lemmy.world 31 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Just have a lot of sex and it will literally shave itself thin. Then in the end you can just snap it off like a twig. Trust me.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That sounds horrific, I think I'll just get bottom surgery

[–] aBundleOfFerrets@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 months ago

I mean that’s the method they use, thats why you are under anesthesia (they don’t use real people though)

[–] lady_maria@lemmy.world 23 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Are you enjoying FNV? Is it your first time playing it?

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)

First playthrough, if you have any mod recommendations it would be very appreciated :3 (I just started an I'm willing to restart)

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 21 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

https://vivanewvegas.moddinglinked.com/

There’s a lot there and if you are just going for the vanilla experience I’d recommend just installing the utilities and bug fixes mod categories (just follow the guide until you wrap up the “base finish” section”), but generally that’s an accepted list to truly make your NV experience excellent

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Well yes Jessica, I wouldn't have said "an accepted list" if I shared something that wasn't up to date or I would have been internet wrecked

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I should have said "well maintained," as in "unlikely to be abandoned out of the blue." Also, who is this "Jessica" you speak of? That's totally not me :3

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Makes sense Jessica. I’ll be sure not to call you Jessica again, Jessica

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] kautau@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Sure thing! New Vegas is my absolute favorite game of all time so feel free to ask questions

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Do you have a guide that works on Linux :3

(I use Arch btw)

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

This is specifically for the steam deck, but the instructions shouldn’t be that far off

https://gist.github.com/richardgaywood/e64eeb162062adb501fd3d35add9a0e8

[–] Theme@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 10 months ago

I'm so jealous, New Vegas is my favourite game, I wish I could recapture that first play through vibe

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 20 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Does it work with masturbation? If yes, then I might deliberately have to keep myself debuffed, otherwise I'd be too big for most people.

[–] shasta@lemm.ee 16 points 10 months ago

Depends on grip strength

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

Does it work with masturbation?

The reverse, actually. Masturbation builds up the vital muscles of the pubis and grant improved agility as well as a higher stopping power during ejaculation.

[–] Toribor@corndog.social 19 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Gotta brag about how shriveled up my wang is from all the action. It's like a Slim Jim, positively haunted.

[–] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 15 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

This needs to become a modern day chick tract. Print up tons of this meme & leave them in truck stop bathrooms across the country!

You can follow it up with one about how Viagra will make hair grow on your palms!

[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The last thing I'd want to do is inadvertently fuel a new complex for incels about how women are out to shrink their penises.

[–] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

lol, I don’t think most incels could find a truck stop if they wanted too. There aren’t any to stop at along the way between their rage boners & their keyboards…

I wanna fuel a new complex within the religious right! Now that crowd values a truck stop!

[–] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 12 points 10 months ago

That's why they call me, "needle-dick the bug fucker"! 😎

[–] Adramis@midwest.social 11 points 10 months ago

Drow matriarchs be like:

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemm.ee 8 points 10 months ago

this wouldnt work it would just turn into a contest to use penis shriveled the most

[–] probableprotogen@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 10 months ago

For a minute I thought the right one was just a cheeto

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 0 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The vagina stretching thing would only happen if the woman had successively larger penises entering each time, so if she had a lot of sex with multiple partners who all had the same penile girth, it should remain the same relative size.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 11 points 10 months ago

Have you been fucking play doh again?

[–] CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com -5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don't think that's true. Vaginas stretch out with use. You are right that if the dicks kept getting bigger, they would stretch it more, but the same sized dick can absolutely stretch out a pussy over time. My anecdotal evidence is having a sexual relationship with someone who's pussy was so tight it hurt sometimes, stopped being so tight over time, then we stopped talking for like 6 months and when we had sex again she was almost as tight as the first time we had sex.

[–] Promethiel@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Lad, women are tenser at first fucking's because, in theory, you're both getting used to each other and what most turns on the machinery of arousal. They tend to feel smoother, slicker, and downright hungrily pulling, when a woman is most aroused. You are self owning a tad bit to any one who knows how to lay a proper lovin'.

[–] CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com 2 points 10 months ago

It can be slick and pulling in while also squeezing so tight that it hurts. They aren't mutually exclusive