How many meetings were wasted on that
this post was submitted on 28 Jul 2025
235 points (98.4% liked)
Not The Onion
17420 readers
1061 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
12 meetings, countless emails, a 7-day relaxation retreat for all the CEO's and their spouses, and a separate 4-day retreat for the CEOs and their side pieces.
They decided this via the group message before the first meeting, but they had to make it look good for the shareholders.
Dont forget the complimentary Cold Play concert for the C-suite and their side pieces
David Zaslav will have made hundreds of millions of dollars to merge and then de merge these companies. Tell me again how CEOs are more valuable workers
he also enabled conservatives to take over CNN, he allowed MALONE to do this.
Yeah of course but honestly conservatives have controlled all American media for 30 years
Merging the 2 companies is the best idea ever!
Splitting into 2 companies is the best idea ever!
Well, which is it?
It's both. One is before the transfer of any and all debt/liability and the other is after.
Merging, taking the subsidies you want to keep and then splitting off the ones you don't want
They're basically putting the profitable bits of both into Warner Bros and all the debt and legacy baggage from both into Discovery, so kinda both. It's all a big shell game.
Depends on what the hype among management consultants was ten years ago.
All those people gotta be paid. What else are they supposed to do? Deliver food or clean bathrooms?
Only the business consultants who recommended rebranding "HBO Max" to "HBO Max" (over the course of three years) could've come up with something so bold.
It was McKinsey both times, and they made over 100 million dollars on it (not kidding)
Yep. The single biggest con job Zaslav ever fell for, and he fell for it twice.
He might literally be the worst man in show business. Both in terms of human decency and business acumen.
This is why I moved into B2B. It's stupidly absurd. They've lost all sense of the real value of money and just toss it around willy nilly.
If you ever feel like your job is meaningless, remember that there are people who are paid to be marketers.
it would be HBO MAX+ next, or HBO ULTRA MAX+
They missed their chance to go 'HBO NOW GO MAX'
HBO PREMIUN PRO MAX+, for $10.99 more you get a extra "+"added to it.
They should tap into the gamer market. HBO Min/Max - Optimize your viewing habits to minimize not fun while maximizing fun fun!
So they merged, fucked up a whole bunch of properties and canned others and then just split like nothing happened?
Of course not. They also paid out millions in consulting fees and executive bonuses
Nah, they rearranged things to get rid of Warner's TV side because they think TV has no future.
The way out is through.
Points to them for not calling Warner Bros. "Discovery" and Discovery "Warner Bros.".
I was hoping for
Disco Bros and Warnervery
We're the Warner Bros!
And the Warner Sister!
And the Warner Very
Lol picturing the most aggressively non-binary Warner sibling saying that last line
What will they think of next?
Damn, just lost a lot of money on my bets of "Warner Discovery" and "Brothers".
Warner Brothers > fast forward > Time Warner (when i was child) > AOL Time Warner > WarnerMedia > Warner Brothers Discovery > Warner Brothers.
“You have no idea of the physical toll that two mergers have on a company”
"I hate Discovery."
"This isn't the Star Trek show."
"Oh... never mind."
Hey, are we going to get the original Discovery channel back? Or any of the good ones from old cable? No? Oh well...
people refer it as STD, and people joked how bad the show is, and its a disease.
That must takes a long time to decide :)
Some consulting firm surely was paid a few million to come up with these names.
Consulting Firm: Let’s roll the dice, do we wanna confuse customers with new names?
"If we confuse them now, we can get another contract in a few years to fix the naming situation again!"
The people in charge are not smarter than you.
Ah, yes, I too remember AOL/Time-Warner...
I totally thought this was a joke...
“We Fucked It Up Corp.”
What's in a name?
Apparently a whole lot
We're at the point that any name recognition is worth serious coin