this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2026
416 points (99.5% liked)

Not The Onion

22409 readers
995 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] ImInLoveWithLife@lemmy.world 158 points 6 days ago (5 children)

Isn't this the same piece of shit that shoved his service weapon down someone's throat during sex, used Flock to stalk his ex, casually used racial slurs in texts, and threw the Nazi salute in photos? Don't worry, I already know it is, but it's probably just your average Tuesday for most county deputies in Florida.

[–] Witchfire@lemmy.world 89 points 6 days ago (5 children)

Isn't this the same piece of shit that shoved his service weapon down someone's throat during sex, used Flock to stalk his ex, casually used racial slurs in texts, and threw the Nazi salute in photos

You're gonna have to be more specific /s

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] moondoggie@lemmy.world 21 points 6 days ago

Oh, you mean the guy with the “unrelated administrative investigation”

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 6 days ago

I believe it is.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 134 points 6 days ago (4 children)

Besides speeding, records indicate Fultz did not have an endorsement on his driver license that is required to operate a motorcycle.

What's the phrase? "Never commit two crimes at the same time". I guess we need to add "...unless you're a cop, and then its all cool, bro".

[–] huppakee@lemmy.world 28 points 6 days ago (1 children)

It's not a crime if you're above the law /s

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] EvacuateSoul@lemmy.world 12 points 6 days ago (6 children)

I got a motorcycle permit 18 years ago, but never did the (1) driving test where you have a friend bring a car and a trooper rides with them and follows you around or (2) a motorcycle safety course. At some point they removed option 1.

It showed as an AM license (CDL also) with a restriction of licensed MC operator over 21 in sight. For the one year I actually rode a motorcycle, I hoped I could talk my way out of it. "Ah shoot where did Uncle Joe go? He didn't see you stop me?"

My last license renewal, the worker and I were friendly, and she was impressed how fast I did the hazmat test without missing any. She asked about the permit and I told her I've just never gotten around to it, but for some reason have paid $6 extra per renewal to keep it on there.

Without saying anything, she must have removed the restriction. So I now have a motorcycle license.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 80 points 6 days ago (39 children)

Somehow read this that he avoided arrest because of the “Super Speeder” law. Like if you speed fast enough, it’s so impressive, they let you out of the ticket. Didn’t realize this was NOTtheonion. Made for an interesting interpretation on my first read.

[–] ecvanalog@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

That’s exactly how my brain read the headline.

load more comments (38 replies)
[–] Initech_vs_Initrode@lemmy.zip 57 points 6 days ago (14 children)

“But there’s a fairly decent amount of traffic. He was not weaving. He wasn’t doing anything like that. He was in a straight line in the left lane.”

I don't care at all about a motorcycle riding at those speeds under those conditions.

ACAB because of cop favoritism, and fuck this scumbag in particular, though.

load more comments (14 replies)
[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 64 points 6 days ago (2 children)

The Florida Highway Patrol caught Brevard County Deputy of the Year Michael Fultz riding his motorcycle 111 mph while off duty in February but did not arrest him under Florida’s ‘Super Speeder’ law, News 6 has learned.

Instead, the FHP trooper issued Fultz a civil traffic citation for exceeding the posted speed limit by 9 mph, records show.

“I’m not going to take you to jail, Fultz,” Trooper Joshua Provencher told the deputy, according to a video recording of the traffic stop obtained by News 6. “Obviously you and I are buddies. I’m not trying to show favoritism, either.”

[–] charade_you_are@sh.itjust.works 62 points 6 days ago

Well, to be fair, as long as he said he's not showing favoritism, that means he's not showing favoritism. I see nothing wrong here and I'm glad these stand up guys don't get in trouble.

Oh well if there's no favoritism. So you or I could do that and he obviously would do the same thing. Or someone who was a different color or religion. No favoritism.

[–] Fleur_@aussie.zone 16 points 5 days ago (10 children)

I really didn't think the Lemmy consensus would be "speeding is okay actually especially on a motorcycle"

load more comments (10 replies)
[–] prostatitis@lemmy.world 28 points 6 days ago (1 children)

FHP also did not address how it might respond to public concerns that the deputy may have received special treatment.

mhm

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

After reading the whole article, IMO Fultz should be charged for what he actually did, and the sergeant who told the trooper, "It's up to you," should be disciplined for not doing his job. Making unpopular decisions is one of the reasons supervisory people get paid more. That guy dodged his responsibility, laying the risks he should have taken himself onto the trooper - risk of punishment for ignoring the infraction, risk of ostracism by other officers for making the arrest. When a subordinate specifically consults you for advice, it's your job to give it. This guy plain and simple let his trooper down. If he isn't stepping up right now to take 100% of the heat, his superiors should be penalizing him for still not doing his job.

[–] Darkonion@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

But have you considered how much easier it would be to speed if 90% of the other drivers were in a train instead? There could be so many fewer potholes if oversized vehicles were restricted. The roads could be for local commercial vehicles and enthusiasts - all speed all the time.

[–] Funkt4st1c@lemmy.world 18 points 6 days ago

Isnt this the guy that also stalked his ex with Flock, put his service gun in her mouth, etc etc?

load more comments
view more: next ›