I could never feel safe on a date with someone who censors swear words in screenshots they post to the fucking Internet.

I think if someone implied they were bringing someone without at least asking, as this person did, I would match their rude energy and say "I did not agree to that, so here are my boundaries."

The way the other party phrased it would annoy the shit out of me. 'I'm bringing my best friend." Ok, so why don't you date them? Causes way more friction than asking "Hey, I know it's unconventional but I would like a friend to be there just for my safety since we don't know eachother yet."

This happened to me, but we all went back to my apartment and played Smash Bros. I did not get laid and I have no regrets.

I had a girl bring a guy friend along on our first date without giving me a heads up for the same reason. I was like, ok that's a little weird but whatever. I'm certainly not going to give someone shit for doing something that makes them feel comfortable. Ended up chatting it up with the guy friend who turned out to be super cool.

So me and the girl end up seriously dating after a while and she later tells me that she spent most of our first date trying to subtly get her friend to leave so that she could spend more time with me.

You are not wrong. But I think you are being an asshole about it. You could have said "that is cool, but I'm not paying for her food" and is it. No need to be rude.

Last time a chick brought a friend with her, I got on better with the friend... And I went home with the friend. Pro tip, if youre bringing a friend. Dont make it a friend thats better to talk to than you are.

It wouldn't bother me if somebody wanted to bring a friend on a date. However, I would communicate that it would change the dynamic into a "hangout" over a traditional "date" for me. The difference being that a date carries romantic intent and a hangout is for the sake of connecting with others without romantic expectations. Also, a hangout means everybody pays for themselves.

This takes the pressure off by lowering the stakes since it's now just a casual hangout between peers. It also has the benefit of making the third not feel excluded as a third wheel but a welcome part of the group.

I had a girl cancel and reschedule our first date shortly before we were supposed to meet up. That date happened, and she confided in me that she'd done that on purpose to gauge my reaction and general demeanor before actually coming out to meet me. I respected that move, and I think I would have been okay with her bringing a friend instead, as long as it was just the once.

Anyway, that was eight years ago, we're married now.

Is it still normalized that the man should pay the date?

What year is it? 1825?

I get it, I absolutely respect someone wanting to be safe, but i think it would also absolutely ruin the date for me. I just can't really interact the same way in a group as I do one on one. Either that, or I'd end upv mirroring both of them simultaneously and it would end up in a throuple.

Grey text is looking out for their safety, good for them. Blue text is clearly communicating their boundaries, good for them. Neither is phrasing their needs as I would, but that's small potatoes. I'd rather date either of these people than most of the ones replying in this thread.

Who gives out money on a first date? Go have walk somewhere.

It took me far too long to realize what "apeach" or "abutt" meant

If you bring a friend, they better be down for a 3 way if things go well. The only time this hapoened to me, was when two girls invited me to a 3way and then one of them chickened out, then got mad that I still fucked her friend. Like... That was the entire reason I was there!

This is very common in Asia. The first few (not) dates they bring friends and you can too. Eventually, she gives an indication that she wants to do something alone with you and that’s when the real dates begin.

I had a girl ask if it was OK to bring a friend once, I said it was fine. She ended up coming alone anyway.

First dates are Dutch. Hard stop.

Anything else is an escort, and at least double means something with them.

You bring your friend, fine, but you or they pay for their meal and yours.

I'm here to see if we match, not serve as a stopgap in the apts food budget.

I had a girl do that on our first date. She was feeling insecure because she never dated online before. Once she felt comfortable with me, her friends left.

I’ve been dating most of my life and never once had a woman ask to bring a friend and I am a very large man. Also, I feel like 1st dates are implied dutch unless someone offers to pay. I’ve never discussed who will pay before a date in my life. I don’t know how he would even think he’d be paying for the friend too. It wouldn’t even cross my mind as something a woman would assume a date was expected to do. If a woman expected that at check time, I would be pretty surprised. Maybe I’m just old, but this whole interaction feels weird.

Can i bring a friend too, otherwise it's an uneven fight.

I remember when a date auction at my college worked this way, the girls always came in pairs. When I thought about it afterwards, it made sense, but it still made me feel just apprehensive enough in the moment - being outnumbered in a moment of social vulnerability - that I didn’t bid on anyone.