this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2024
128 points (95.7% liked)

the_dunk_tank

15897 readers
1 users here now

It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It's so joever

Link

top 42 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Thordros@hexbear.net 78 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My nine year old watched the debate and turned to me and said, "How can an election held in such an atmosphere of class conflicts, class enmity, and pressure brought to bear on the electors by the capitalists be called altogether free and altogether democratic? This debate is a farce. Only in a nation where there are no capitalists and no landlords—and, consequently, no pressure exerted by propertied classes—may there be an atmosphere of collaboration between the workers, the peasants, and the intelligentsia, free of pressure distorting their will."

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 50 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

The kid:

Fun fact he's 25 here

[–] Thordros@hexbear.net 30 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)
[–] joaomarrom@hexbear.net 77 points 11 months ago
[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 60 points 11 months ago (2 children)
  1. I too can make shit up, my kids are rabid Maoists that read theory for dinner

  2. I hate that Biden is "the good one" based on the fact alone that he isn't Trump. How is Strom Thurmunds buddy a good person again?

[–] BountifulEggnog@hexbear.net 29 points 11 months ago

that read theory for dinner

Communism no food :smuglord:

[–] BeamBrain@hexbear.net 20 points 11 months ago

All of my children are hardcore Maoists who have pledged their lives to the destruction of the Great Satan

spoilerThis is technically true, since I don't have any children

[–] ExtimateCookie@hexbear.net 55 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I have a feeling white libs procreate just for the "my x years old said" tweets

[–] nat_turner_overdrive@hexbear.net 36 points 11 months ago (1 children)

my 7 year old cat said "the ORANGE BUFFOON is a bad man and I'm with Joe!"

[–] DirtyPair@hexbear.net 21 points 11 months ago

why'd your cat go after garfield like that?

[–] TheDoctor@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago

White lib here. Can confirm.

[–] Angel@hexbear.net 40 points 11 months ago (6 children)
[–] Skeleton_Erisma@hexbear.net 40 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)
[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 31 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] axont@hexbear.net 26 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 21 points 11 months ago

steve jobs gottem

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 22 points 11 months ago

Deez ligmas

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago

That just came up as ******, what gives?

[–] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 18 points 11 months ago

Billiam Brayden Aiden Hayden-Kil'jaeden Neveah Candida Peighleigh Javelina Zelenskyyy Bonzales-Forsmythington XVII

[–] Teekeeus@hexbear.net 15 points 11 months ago

keir macron baerbock

[–] ComradeLove@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago

Samuel Clemons.

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 34 points 11 months ago

Those first two were rough, but that third really was worth the spoiler tag for the faint of heart.

[–] TheDoctor@hexbear.net 33 points 11 months ago

I sat my kid down to watch the presidential debate. When he felt the alienation inherent to to political system, easily palpable even at his age, he despaired. So I informed him that the time we just spent together was meaningless and I made him watch this thing for no particular reason. This is a very emotional story.

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 31 points 11 months ago

you got sam alito strung upside down like il duce for a pfp but Your Guy to fix that shit is fucking Biden lmao

[–] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 30 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I had hidden those second two tweets away in a corner of my brain that you unearthed, and now I'm forced to feel that queezy feeling in my stomach at cringe on a level I find hard to describe.

So I mean, fuck you I guess.

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

Consider this an inoculation for the next four years

[–] AnarchoSnowPlow@midwest.social 28 points 11 months ago

My 4 year old heard 5 minutes of the debate and asked me why people placed so much stock in a president's ability to respond coherently to questions in a high pressure situation. I explained that it's an unfair expectation and that he'd better straighten up Jack.

Then he farted as he walked away to eat a bowl of dog food. Cause he's a great dane.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 26 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I thought the tweet was only a stupid joke but then I noticed the name - Elie Mystal. He's a lawyer and big-time MSNBC legal expert lib. So...

1. He lied to get likes.

or

2. He actually subjected his kid to the debate.

[–] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I wanna know why my X year old kids have never had the profundity that their kids do.

I think that’s probably Gommulism’s fault probably.

[–] Speaker@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

Holy Wisdom Shit Balls.

[–] SpanishSpaceAgency@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago

watch them have 0 turnout because everyone gave up but still blame it on the left.

thank god i stopped giving a fuck to electoralism

[–] buh@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

Joekanda forever 🙅

[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

Maybe cringe is an ableist or 'phobic thing for the average lib. Me? I cringe to these fuckin tweets cringe

[–] sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The 2nd may seem unbelievably cringe until you consider his mom died in 1999.

[–] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 15 points 11 months ago

And with a handle like LiberalLecter, he probably saw the corpse and went all xok-og with some fava beanis and a nice chianti

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

There's no way that first one isn't a bit. It's so silly.

[–] save_vs_death@hexbear.net 14 points 11 months ago

too bad the only possible choice was a person that can't speak

[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago

By the bottom of this collection I could feel my brain trying its level best to stroke out.

[–] Red_Sunshine_Over_Florida@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

There is once again a cheeto-man in the White House.

[–] radiofreeval@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago

Vally need drinky.