Ask Lemmy

As a kid I trusted adults knew what they were doing. As an adult I now know they have no clue what they are doing.

Lack of empathy is not something people grow out of, it seems like it is something that grows more severe the older people get.

Success in life is 75% luck. Everything you control (dedication, tenacity, ambition, follow through, dependability) is in the first 25%. The remaining 75% is just luck that you have no control over. That doesn't mean you can slack on that first 25%, but even if you absolutely kill it on the first 25% you can still fail in life. I say this as someone that most would consider successful. Yes I worked hard to get where I am, but lots of people work far harder and have far less. I was born in the right place, with the right talents, in the right period in time/history, and with enough of the preferred genetics. Even had everything else been equal and I was born 20 years earlier or 20 years later, I wouldn't be nearly as successful.

It shouldn't be like this. Its not fair its like this, but this is reality.

People are mostly dumb. Justice is largely a myth. Chaos reigns.

Most Americans can't read past an 8th-grade level, and that shocks hell out of me. When I was in 6th-grade, standardized tests pegged me at "college level", which I figured was utter bullshit, thought I was being buttered-up somehow. Turns out it was true.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Literacy_in_the_United_States

In 2023, 28% of adults scored at or below Level 1, 29% at Level 2, and 44% at Level 3 or above.[1] Adults scoring in the lowest levels of literacy increased 9 percentage points between 2017 and 2023. In 2017, 19% of U.S. adults achieved a Level 1 or below in literacy while 48% achieved the highest levels.[2]

Anything below Level 3 is considered "partially illiterate" (see also § Definitions below).[3] Adults scoring below Level 1 can comprehend simple sentences and short paragraphs with minimal structure but will struggle with multi-step instructions or complex sentences, while those at Level 1 can locate explicitly cued information in short texts, lists, or simple digital pages with minimal distractions but will struggle with multi-page texts and complex prose.[4] In general, both groups struggle reading complex sentences, texts requiring multiple-step processing, and texts with distractions.[4]

This explains so much about all the stupid shit I see. Most Americans literally aren't literate enough to follow a piece of literature, would struggle with any given novel.

Not being able to stand up for yourself against people who can control/manipulate you financially.

Shower sex.

In the movies it looks so hot, but in reality, you've got a eyes and mouth full of soap and your freezing. 2/10

How easy and fast it is to cook good food. My mom acted like making real mashed potatoes was sooo difficult.

What comes to mind to me are two things:

1. The absurdity of religion. I was raised Christian but always asked tough questions, to which people responded with the various platitudes religious people love to use. (The most popular being "God works in mysterious ways.") I missed out on a lot of sexual experience and mistreated a lot of people because I was taught to behave in certain ways, and I regret it deeply.

2. How much I was lied to or information omitted by my educators growing up, particularly on history. I read history books for fun, and have learned over time about many things that were deliberately withheld from my education, like the Tulsa Massacre and the Battle of Blair Mountain, or stories of the Black Panthers' community building work, or the wholesale exploitation and destruction of indigenous people to make handful of people rich via the reservation system and Indian Ring.

Many adults have a much self-reflection and critical thinking skills as a 3-year-old.

Also, you can be highly intelligent yet very dumb.

All the adults in my life with the exception of a very few are exactly as stupid or far stupider than I thought when I was a kid.

That "adults" are just kids that got older. Same goes for "old people". Everyone was once a 14 year old. There is no dividing line where you suddenly become an adult, and there is no dividing line between being an adult and being old.

We're all born, and we live a life of days, months years, decades... it's just you and your one, single life. You're always going to be you.

Make this one life count. Don't wait. Don't procrastinate. Make shit happen. You'll regret it if you don't.

Everyone wants something from you and they want it NOW, but when you need something it's like pulling teeth to even get acknowledgement.

Nobody cares. You're homeless? Nobody cares. You just got dumped? Nobody cares. You're sick? Nobody cares. You're struggling? Nobody cares.

Sure you might have some friends who care in a very superficial way, but when the going gets tough, everybody leaves.

There's just no hope, and you're on your own.

If you'll forgive the cliche "Adulthood is realizing that Cheese is expensive and SO many people are on cocaine".

How many mundane things you have to do just to stay alive and well. Skipping things means more problems down the road. Every few years your energy capacity just lowers by 50% and you will never get it back. People often don't follow their own advice. Most people will never change because they won't want to challenge their own beliefs about themselves. Most people have rigid beliefs about the world because of the same reason.

That despite all the progress humanity has made, bigotry in all forms is still a major problem.

Nobody gives a single shit about you.

That highschool never ended for most people and the shitty cliques and drama continue for decades.

Bowling For Soup said it better than I ever could:

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who's the best dressed and who's havin' sex Who's got the money, who gets the honeys
Who's kinda cute and who's just a mess

And you still don't have the right look
And you don't have the right friends
Nothin' changes but the faces, the names and the trends
High school never ends

It doesn't ever get better. We are stuck until we mercifully die.
No matter what I do it will always be an endless cycle of unmanageable chores and work, ever-changing medication and dumb productivity tips while I watch other people do everything effortlessly because they weren't born a disabled retard like myself. My achievements went from getting a good grade to being able to wash the dishes

Your success in life is dictated by the social connections you have and how good you are at maintaining them. When I was young I thought focusing on my education and working harder would automatically lead to a successful career, and while good academic performance does help, what's far more useful is having connections who will help you out, either through referrals or just by being a source of information about stuff you didn't know and it's easy to have some social life in school or college without much effort, because everyone meets up at a single place, as an adult socialization takes effort, cause now everyone is away living their own busy lives and it's not as easy to meet up face to face. This is why rich people like exclusive clubs so much, being able to be in the right social circles and having the ear of influential people will pay huge dividents. Also being a skilled liar is definately a very useful skill to have.

Im not worried about how the average pedestrian acts. Its totally the average driver.

Taxes.

I never became adult

Life is only shades of gray it’s not a marvel movie with clear cut Good and Bad