this post was submitted on 06 Mar 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 74 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (7 children)

Girls liking cute skinny guys really, really pisses off chuds. I can't tell you how many shlubby bearded gamer-bro types I've heard complaining about "girls like girlish boys not manly men like me nowadays, what the hell is going wrong with the world".

Your out of shape and unkempt appearance was never attractive gamers, there's not a horde of hot twinks out there stealing all the women you just don't care about your own appearance and stay inside all day. Have you tried going to mixed social events and being nice and funny? Have you taken some time working on your appearance to match your expectations? (If you want a woman who shaves and wears make-up, you better be bathing and styling your hair and getting nice clean outfits too)

[–] Adkml@hexbear.net 46 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Literally just mad because they convinced themselves having a "beard" was manly

Now the SJWs took away the only way they could possibly ever be manly.

Nobody's impressed by them dipping bacon into 40 ounces of coke anymore, or at least people are now actually voicing how unimpressed they are.

[–] lapis@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago

dipping bacon into 40 ounces of coke

christ, that's a lot of cocaine

[–] Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Never understood the appeal of those big ass beards that cover the entire lower half of their face and then some, but I see it all the time on chuds

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A more subtle beard is much more superior anyway lenin-pensive

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[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago

Reminds me of the MRA/Kermit bros who wasted years chasing the bag and nothing else then complain about how women don’t like them even though they’re rich lol and they try to make it seem sinister and ask for explanations like “dating is fucked! what’s going on here?!” Dating is certainly a problem, but they convinced themselves they found the secret to women

[–] JuryNullification@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

there's not a horde of hot twinks out there stealing all the women

stuff im a horde of hot twinks stealing all the women

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Overlord games but you're controlling hordes of twinks and not little demon goblins.

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[–] ProfessorAdonisCnut@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Orlando Bloom Legolas was like the biggest heartthrob of a generation, even with Viggo Aragorn right there beside him

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago

and before that, Di Caprio. Before that, the Beatles. idk it always seems to be cute lads and not buff he-men

[–] Florn@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Viggo is way hotter, but I think that's because tolkien elves are like categorically unsexy

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[–] Optimus_Subprime@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Your out of shape and unkempt appearance was never attractive gamers, there's not a horde of hot twinks out there stealing all the women you just don't care about your own appearance and stay inside all day.

See, I don't get why those chuds complain. If you know you look like shit, you have no right to complain.

I, however, look like those schmucks, but I beat my dick like it owes me money and do not complain. Matter of fact, excuse me while I rub one out.

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[–] Spongebobsquarejuche@hexbear.net 58 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Capitalism: 'We need more young people.'

Minorities: Have children.

Capitalism: 'Not like that.'I

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 41 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Capitalism: "We need more young people."

People: "Okay so can we get better wages so one partner can afford to stay at home and raise children?"

Capitalism: bugs-no

[–] demonquark@lemmy.ml 33 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Tbf, capitalism doesn’t mind minorities. More cheap labor to exploit.

This is more of an ethno-nationalist: we need more young people.

As an American I fail to see the difference.

[–] QueerCommie@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago

Capitalism likes to create scapegoats around minorities, it obviously isn’t threatened.

[–] Magician@hexbear.net 50 points 1 year ago

World on fire, economy trash, unstable future

No, it's the twinks who are wrong.

[–] CoolYori@hexbear.net 49 points 1 year ago

A real measurehead take

[–] Bay_of_Piggies@hexbear.net 47 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They're thinking and complaining that the ideal man is an evil gay, and the ideal women is an evil lesbian. They're just being homophobic while talking about straight people.

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[–] IMF_DOOM@hexbear.net 41 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Ngl I thought this post was a gay person saying that the reason birth rates were declining was that everyone was going gay for the twinks and murder ladies

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago
[–] bananon@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago

I finally understand Lacan

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[–] AutomatedPossum@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

when your name is literally dick and the murder twinks still don't want to fuck you

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago (1 children)

there's something Freudian about his twitter handle being 1 letter off of girl_dick

[–] QueerCommie@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I thought that was intentional lmao

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago

someone this insecure who's worried about birth rates and the twinkification of the American male does not have the self-awareness to make a joking name like that. Their name is probably Gabriel Dick and they didn't notice their handle had any other implication.

[–] The_Jewish_Cuban@hexbear.net 32 points 1 year ago (10 children)

Guys I know whoever posted this a nut but as an extremely hairy overweight man reading through this comment section was kind of depressing in that it made me feel like my body makes others perceived me to be some invel loser merely because of those factors. I get this guy is being a homophobic douche but damn could we tone it down with body shaming. I swear people here pretend to care about that shit until a"gamer" comes along. Staying in shape is hard. Please don't make your points aboutincels need to groom themselves by bashing their bodies

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[–] Wheaties@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago

Gosh, movies these days sure are violent. I'm sure this is a completely new phenomenon.

[–] ZWQbpkzl@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm guessing that a murder twink is a Tim Burton protagonist, but what the hell is a Lacanian Super Predator?

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A young blonde lady apparently? shrug-outta-hecks

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[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

For all their prudishness, hogs are more obsessed with sex than what they say "the left" is

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it's true. last year no one had any babys, and its cuz of timothee chalamay's pink pucker

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

Woman have wrong color skin BAD

[–] Dr_Gabriel_Aby@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago

James Dean was scrawny and gay as hell

[–] Angel@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago

jesse-wtf

Gabriel, what the fuck are you talking about?

[–] DyingOfDeBordom@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

tag yourself I'm the murder twink

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[–] sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I saw Murder Twink open for Lacanian Super Predator in 2018. INSANE pit at that show.

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[–] GenderIsOpSec@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago

frothingfash wimmen dont smile no more

[–] SteamedHamberder@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (4 children)

What’s the syndnee Sweeney controversy? I guess I was extremely online but apparently not enough

[–] HarryLime@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I honestly don't know. Some conservatives seem to be saying she's evil and woke, while others are saying she's anti-woke or heralding the end of wokeness or something. As far as I can tell, she's hot and blonde and has large breasts and that's short circuiting the brains of conservatives trying to fit her into their culture war somehow.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But in terms of coomer brain the bigger your cup size the less woke you are?

[–] HarryLime@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago

I just don't know. This guy says she's more woke, or something. According to the National Post she's anti-woke: https://twitter.com/nationalpost/status/1765461626734497802

They haven't figured out their line on her yet

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[–] rootsbreadandmakka@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

please why the hell do I have to see sydney sweeney everywhere

am I wrong for thinking half of this country's obsession with her is because incels and other chuds consider her the picture of the ideal tradwife? I mean, no hate towards sydney, but she is exactly the type of woman these people obsess over and draw in their memes

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[–] TheaJo@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago

Yeah no one is getting that woman pregnant. She gets OTHERS pregnant

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