this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2025
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Based on a true story.

[Alt-text]A brain asks a woman in bed, "Hey you goin' to sleep?". The woman responds, "Yes, now shut up". The brain says, "The internet is speculating that Trump died." The woman has a dead eye stare and is not going to sleep in a timely fashion.

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[–] peaceful_world_view@lemmy.world 133 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I feel like I'll know when he's dead.....like the air will somehow be easier to breathe.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 43 points 1 month ago

Less cheeto dust in the wind...

[–] CileTheSane@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The air will be filled with cheering and celebration

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[–] lath@piefed.social 96 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Vance said 'I'm ready to be president, just in case' and some people were like 'oh shit, it's happening!'.

[–] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 67 points 1 month ago (2 children)

People were starting to talk about Trumps politics again instead of the Epstein files so they planted a new distraction.

It's so obvious and yet we keep falling for it.

[–] FaceDeer@fedia.io 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't think they would deliberately use a distraction that paints Trump as being weak.

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 11 points 1 month ago
[–] birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 month ago

Release the Epstein Files, Pedo Trump

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Yeah but do we really think Vance has the, idk what you'd call it, moron-charm? Charm that attracts only morons? Whatever it is that Trump offers?

[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 11 points 1 month ago

He doesn't. Vance has all the personality and presence of cold oatmeal.

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[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 84 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Hey Americans, this is a feature of living under authoritarianism: to have a widespread conspiracy theory that the incumbent was replaced by the double. Get used to it.

[–] 0x0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Trump is already a mushroom, just ask Stormy Daniels

[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 8 points 1 month ago

"Trump is a mushroom" will occur in 20 years when the population finds it unable to exist in a reality without Trump.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

Wait, Paul isn't dead?

[–] VinnyDaCat@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah the cultists that voted him in who are starting to realize what is really unfolding in our country can't believe it. "It can't really be him, he loves us, he cares for us! It must be a fake!"

[–] pentastarm@piefed.ca 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)

None of those people have enough self reflection or care for others to give a shit what is unfolding. As long as "the right people" are being hurt they are happy.

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[–] Damage@feddit.it 62 points 1 month ago (3 children)

If he hasn't, can we start a conspiracy theory that he's been replaced?

[–] Blubber28@lemmy.world 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What do you mean "theory," he definitely has been

;)

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[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 54 points 1 month ago (3 children)
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[–] hellfire103@lemmy.ca 51 points 1 month ago
[–] Bebopalouie@lemmy.ca 49 points 1 month ago (3 children)

And I am saving this for when the child molester is dead.

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[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 44 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

God damn it.

Don't give me hope.

[–] Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Great! 11½ years of Vance 😥

[–] princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zone 40 points 1 month ago (3 children)

If following the law, which let's face it, they won't, then it would only be 7½ years of Vance. According to the 22nd Amendment if anyone takes over for the President before the two year mark, then they are only allowed to run for one extra term. If they take over after the two year mark then they may run for two more terms, for a maximum of ten years.

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[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

There is about a 0 percent chance Vance wins an election without Trump's coat tails to ride.

Vance will not be able to hold the coalition together.

[–] Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Cute that you think you'll get elections.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

Vance isn't capable of holding this coalition together.

It's obviously when you hear the timbre in his voice: Vance is a fraud and Vance knows he's a fraud. When. he's trying to be a bully, he knows he's hollow insid; he, like so many other hollow suits, has no real beliefs. It's why he's so useful to venture capital.

When Trump speaks, it's with an absolute conviction in whatever spew is coming from his lips. It doesn't matter what it is. Whatever Trump says, to Trump, he believes to be true.

Trump is a true bully, and deeply insecure: It's why he doesn't suffer strong people in his presence. Because of this there is no one to fill the void he'll create.

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[–] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 32 points 1 month ago

Don't get my hopes up

[–] morphballganon@mtgzone.com 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Nah we'll know when he does. More likely he's ill, possibly on the way out.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 month ago
[–] aBundleOfFerrets@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

supreme leaders cannot die. they simply pass the torch to the next chosen

[–] bmpvy@feddit.org 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What's the story behind this?

[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 1 month ago

The rumor mill is running late into the night on BlueSky and apparently Twitter. I haven't seen anything compelling. But I'm still awake so...

[–] fuckgod@feddit.online 15 points 1 month ago

This is so real. I was literally finally laying down when my brother got me with this.

[–] KazuchijouNo@lemy.lol 13 points 1 month ago

Please let me wake up to a brighter world. For once, pls

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

i thought the fourth panel would be her finally getting a good night's sleep.

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[–] alx@piefed.blahaj.zone 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

he never was alive to begin with

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[–] salacious_coaster 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

"Trump dead" has a cleaner graph because it's a 10x more common way people phrase it.

[–] ToastedPlanet@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm from the 20th century. We spoke differently back then.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 30 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

No, you didn't.

Stars&Stripes Newspaper: "Hitler Dead"

It's just that people are looking for headlines.

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[–] salacious_coaster 14 points 1 month ago

Just popped over to Bsky to look. Don't tease me, universe...

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