this post was submitted on 05 Jan 2026
500 points (92.2% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

36539 readers
4701 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] DeltaWingDragon@sh.itjust.works 1 points 19 hours ago


"Platonic solids for my real friends and real solids for my platonic friends!" -- xkcd 1645 - Toasts


-- Someone's dream (r/thomastheplankengine, reddit frontend)

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 53 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah... You use shampiss to pass a drug test when you know your realpiss won't.

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 17 points 5 days ago

I can't argue with that.

[–] HeyJoe@lemmy.world 33 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Whats with the presentation? Looks like those memes where they shame dogs who did bad things.

[–] Anivia@feddit.org 16 points 5 days ago

Whats with the presentation?

Narcissism

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 7 points 5 days ago

So it should read "I excuse myself to the washroom on dates just to check my IG feed".

[–] abfarid@startrek.website 25 points 5 days ago
[–] OwlVurdy@lemmy.wtf 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Shampiss is what you wash your hair with when you get to the bottom of the bottle and have to mix a little water with it to get it out.

[–] bizarroland@lemmy.world 14 points 5 days ago (2 children)

I've said it before, I'll say it again, down with shampoo, demand real poo!

[–] nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Real poo is free, abundant, and just the right consistency if you eat enough cheese.

enough cheese

does not compute

[–] basxto@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 4 days ago

gives a great tan

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 12 points 5 days ago

Shampoo or Realpoo

[–] 5C5C5C@programming.dev 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Champagne implies the existence of Champleasure

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago

Some people find pleasure in pagne. Lots of guys out there wanting go get spanked by angry women.

[–] UncleGrandPa@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

That’s just a theory. A GAME THEORY!

[–] RestrictedAccount@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Old guy story time

I knew this guy in college who always forgot his shampoo in the shower (dorm with shared bathrooms).

It would enrage him that people would use up his shampoo.

So he filled the bottle with piss and left it for communal use.

[–] dumbass@piefed.social 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, its called American beer.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago

Shots fired!

[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Techlos@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 4 days ago

It's the good shit

[–] SheepHerder@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] Wigglesworth@retrolemmy.com 2 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Would you click if she was?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 days ago

They both exist, and are used when you need to get away from a date, check your phone, or otherwise get some alone time sitting down.

[–] null@piefed.nullspace.lol 5 points 5 days ago

ShamWow implies the existence of LegitMeh

[–] remon@ani.social 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

No it doesn't. Plenty of animals only poo, including most insects and birds.

[–] Speiser0@feddit.org 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

And given the wetness of shampoo, it's unlikely that there's a separate shampiss.

[–] remon@ani.social 1 points 4 days ago

Uhm ... I guess so?

[–] CaptainBasculin@lemmy.bascul.in 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I'm more of a shamshit guy

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

He called shamshit shampoo.

[–] brown567@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 days ago
[–] PrinceOfSloth@lemmy.zip 4 points 5 days ago

This looks like female Rainbolt

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

Don't say that too loud, you'll get trumps attention

[–] KingGimpicus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 days ago

It does.

Due to an unfortunate trait of the French (their language) it's better known as champagne.

Fr all wine and grape derived liquor is yucky and gross. Find better drinks, like rum.

[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

shampoo also implies the (much more likely imho) existence of shamshart

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

I've been wanting my wife to shampiss on me for years...

[–] Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] basxto@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 4 days ago

synthetic natural champagne (German calls piss play natural champagne)

[–] anon_8675309@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

That’s deep.

It’s pronounced sham PAGGin

How does Shamwow fit...

[–] Siegfried@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Shampoo also means the existamce of proudpoo

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 1 points 4 days ago

You mean real poo? Pretty sure that's already a thing.

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 5 days ago

... Shampiss...

...

...

... pre-cum?

[–] kaklerbitmap@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I use Chambraigne! It's got Knowledge Crystals!

https://youtu.be/pbY3JOjQal4

load more comments
view more: next ›